I once vowed to never let another scale in the house. I had some major meltdown and dumped the two scales we had right into the garbage. Even one that was NOT cheap. No, no it wasn’t. One of the fancy one’s that somehow magically measured body fat and water weight (could that even be that accurate?). But then we got the big bright idea that we needed to get a Wii and Wii Fit to motivate us to lose weight. Which, at first, it did for the most part. But I was always skeptical of how it accurately weight us!

I’m not sure I trust it, to be honest.  I went to the doctor today as this flu thing has moved into an upper respiratory infection. Feeling fabulous over here, I am.  Well, I’m being weighed….and the nurse says 152! I’m excited! I’m wearing yoga pants, tshirt, fleece sweatshirt, heavy socks, etc. About 1-2 pounds of clothes, me thinks. I hadn’t yet eaten anything (I was in there early and not feeling well has left me not wanting to eat much) yet. So I go home to the Wii to weight myself on that. I was…er…in the nude, this time around. Wearing…nada. Anyway…it tells me that I’m 152.4.

How can that be possible?!? I was completely naked. Yet I weighed more at home than at the doctor’s office where I was fully dressed! I took the board off the carpet and took off it’s little feet so it laid flat on the hardwood floor and even then it register as 152.1. I don’t get it. Do my clothes not weigh a thing??

I get too obsessed with a number…But I am also tired of staying around 150-152 lately. Which is better than the 154 I was at Christmas and all. But even by the end of February last year, I was around 145. I need to get back there. But I need to get rid of the scale. I HAVE to get rid of my scale habits. I know it’s important to stay motivated sometimes….to use the scale. But for me, it screws me up, mentally…

I also need to stop getting discouraged when I don’t get immediate results from workouts. My body is looking pretty good, if I can say so myself. I got really great feedback from people recently that I haven’t seen in a long time. I certainly don’t LOOK this weight. And I don’t really feel it either.  But I know I can be in a better place and this year has barely begun…It’s too early to get discouraged! I have lost ABOUT 10 pounds since October. That feels good. I may not reach my goal of 130 this year…But I KNOW I’m going to make it to 140. I KNOW it.

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In other random news, Dan left town for a work conference today. He’ll be back tomorrow…not even a big deal. But he left in the morning…just as a winter storm was rolling into town. Which means, I lost my shoveling guy. I have no problem shoveling, don’t get me wrong, but I’m barely over this flu / upper respiratory infection. I’m not supposed to be doing a lot of heavy stuff, you know?? I think Dan had mentioned trying to get a plow, but that never happened. So he texts me this morning and asks if I want to try to use the snow-thrower.  But then he never sends me instructions for how to use it. I can usually figure that stuff out, you know? I know how to use most tools and can certainly run a lawn mower. This can’t be that much different, right? Except it was insanely confusing. And it’s temperamental. Then again, I don’t know if other machines also work this way… But it turned out there were a few more knobs than I was aware of… Ok, long story short, I was in TEARS, practically bawling. It was freezing outside. Dan wasn’t answering any texts. I couldn’t get it to stay started! He finally called me and I was so upset that he could barely understand me. Poor Dan. It’s his birthday. The big 3-0…And he was stuck at a work thing…listening to be bawl on the phone.

I got frustrated and hung up on him. And finally got it started almost a minute after that. I did a BAD job. And it was much harder than I expected! Blah! I did convince Dan to find a plow for me. He just wants me to get better! Love love love him so much!!

I haven’t talked much about weight loss lately, I realize. Mostly because there hasn’t been a significant drop in weight. I still bounce between 151-153 pounds, and have for about a month now. A month ago, before Thanksgiving, I had vowed to be happy with maintaining my weight through the holidays. It’s especially important for me to maintain during the holidays, because last year, I gained somewhere between 5-7 pounds during November and December. Last year, I went from about 146 or 147 to about 153….Which is unfortunately, where I am stuck now.  I have to be proud of myself for losing between 7-9 pounds now. And I have to be proud that so far, from Thanksgiving to the week of Christmas that I have stayed pretty much the same.

I’m  not going to just let go and give up during Christmas and New Years, though. NO WAY.  We are headed to my family’s little Christmas thing on Christmas eve, then going up to Dan’s parent’s house for a few days, then we all head to California.  Dan’s parents have a treadmill, which I vow to be on every single day until we leave for Denver, even if its only for a walk. And recently, his mom splurged and got a Wii Fit, so I can workout with that as well.

I’m most looking forward to Colorado. Lots of walks, snowshoeing, sledding…Dan says he will be surprised if I don’t lose weight while there.

I have mostly decided to not deal with Weight Watchers the next couple of weeks. It’s going to be next to impossible and I will never be near a computer. Yes, I can track online with my cell phone, but that’s kind of annoying.  I am getting better at eating based on serving sizes. I’m wonder how long I should stay on Weight Watchers, anyway. I have been on it now for three months. I think when it expires next month, I’m going to let it expire…It will have been 4 months at that point and I’ll have it long enough after the new year to just jump start things again.

When I feel unhappy about my current weight, I have to think of something a family member told me when I had told them I lost that 8 pounds (I say 8 rather than explaining that I’ve gone back and forth from 7-9, heh….)…. She said that I have kick-started my New Year’s weight loss resolution.  That’s so true!

If I had gotten down to 150 and had hit my first 10 pound goal, would I be any happier than I am right now? I think not. I somehow think that I’d say “if ONLY I’d hit 149…” I think I will make it a goal to get back into the 140s next year. Maybe I’ll be  lucky to see 130s again. That’s my final goal….Those 130s (I will never see the 120s again and won’t even try!).

Here’s to getting through the holidays at this weight and working hard in 2010 to reach my goals…ALL of them!

Today was my Weight Watchers weigh in. *drumroll* 151 lbs!! I am in such a great mood about it. I lost about 2.5 pounds since last week, which according to WW, that’s a tad bad. It’s healthy to lose only 2 pounds a week.  I’m not worried about it. I would be concerned if I suddenly lost 5 pounds in a week. Lol…Stupid WW…. It’s worked so far though. Teaching me to be so much more careful about portion sizes…The importance of working out, too… I have 2 pounds left until I reach my first goal weight. 10 pounds off since the wedding! I’m SO CLOSE!

So it should be easy to take those principles and apply them to the holiday feasts, yes?? I hope so. So far, my willpower has been very strong. And I don’t LOVE the holiday food staples…Not a huge fan of turkey, ham, pumpkin pie, mashed potatoes. I usually will eat little bits of those things to be polite.  But this year, I’m going to do something different. NOT eat things just to be polite. But I will still eat a little bit of turkey. White meat. No gravy. For a little protein. Still need that!

I have to be good because I have two dinners, one on Thursday and one on Friday.  Then we’re driving to Detroit on Saturday, to Ford Field, to watch Dan’s hometown highschool football team play in the state finals game. Should be exciting! Fun! Lots of good food I’m sure throughout the day.

I think I will be good for Thanksgiving. Very good. It will be more difficult after Thanksgiving. Once Christmas starts rolling in. And the more fantastic desserts come out from the cracks in the wall. My plan is to be good. OF COURSE. I will allow myself some small indulgences, but not every single day. And if I am faced with a dessert spread/buffet? Then I will have to be forced to choose ONLY ONE thing. So if I want a cookie AND a brownie? I have to choose one or the other. And it will be one cookie. Or maybe only half the brownie.

It kind of sounds like I’m punishing myself. But it will be the first holiday in which I am good. Very good.

I’m not even packing my “fat” jeans this weekend. So I don’t get tempted to eat a ton….I don’t want an excuse to wear them!

I hope my plan works…

Off to go pack now!

Ok, I don’t know why I stopped following it in the first place. I really need a community of people to keep me going in the world of getting back to fitness and getting my body back! I joined the community when it was brand new last year…And the new challenge is totally about celebrating the anniversary of the site! It has grown so much!

You can also find me here, if you want to follow my weekly weigh ins…Which are on Wednesdays!

Starting in at 153.3! Can you believe that! BELOW 155 for once!! HOLY MOLY! I am in a great mood…

*Not off of hiatus for regular blog posts, but I’m starting to post, in collaboration with Amy…to keep motivating each other…in our strive to get healthy, a little thinner, and to possibly reach a few fitness goals.*

My ultimate goal is to not be pin thin. I’m not sure that is even possible with my curves, but there are so many different names out there for “shrinking” that I wanted to come up with something completely different. I could have named it Operation Skinny Bitch, but lets face it, that book was more hilarious than inspiring to some, myself in particular. It wasn’t real enough for me and the diet seemed a bit out of control. I can’t do vegan, sorry.  My goal is to be a healthier me. I would like to lose about 20 pounds when its all said and done.

While I already began my new healthy lifestyle journey two weeks ago, today starts day one of sharing a lot more of it with you…whether you’re interested or NOT!

Today’s exercise? 30 minutes on the elliptical at the gym and 10 minutes of EA Active.

Food? Well, my current WW points goal is 21 and I am at 19.5 today. With what I’ve eaten and what I plan to eat. I already sucked up a lot of my flex points for the week this past weekend, so I don’t have a ton to work with, unfortunately!

Current Weight: (as of last Friday — I only weigh myself on Fridays) 155.5 pounds. About a 2 pound different from the week before.

See you tomorrow! Hold me accountable, darn it!