I don’t even know what to say right now. I’m insanely frustrated. It’s been a very long day…
Finally went to the doctor because I felt like crap for one second too long. They swabbed up my nose to see if I had a “known” flu strain (how they do that? I don’t know but that sounds like crap!) and they took blood to check my WBC (white blood count). Before all that, when I first GOT to my examination room, the college’s student clinic literally had a tornado drill. Ugh. Seriously? Sigh…. It’s been a long day. I was at the doctors for only a little over an hour. I guess that’s not TOO bad. But it took a lot of energy out of me. A LOT.
In between all that I was coordinating with my very sweet matron of honor…Starting to talk about plans for my bridal shower, dates and such. I’m excited! I think we’re going to host it at one of my favorite restaurants…It will be free to have it there (well, not the FOOD, just the room, lol….) and we’re going to hold it on a Saturday that is not during one of my school semesters. We got it all set with what I wanted, what was more convenient with me…and of course the matron of honor.
But the maid of honor? Is in danger of losing her title. And I don’t feel bad about it.
I texted her today to let her know when we were planning it. August 15th.
This is a nice text conversation between the two of us (since she was at work and I couldn’t call her)
Me: August 15th has been slated for the shower!
Her: I might not be here…I’m on vacation that week…we r planning on going away.
(Right here, I’m thinking…Ok….Not a biggie…maybe moving it up a week…?)
Me: Yeah, alicia [my matron of honor, by the way] is on vacation the following week. i can’t go into september because of school. i’d like to do it then because i am out of the school for just two weeks this summer. blah. whatev.
Her: Ok, I’ll still help plan. I just won’t probably be able to come.
Me: For sure no? Alright….
Her: For sure plan to be gone…sorry.
[Wait…I think she said she…might not be here. So confused.)
Me: Well, what about the 8th?
Her: That’s better. I just can’t guarantee a Saturday until 2 weeks before….our schedule changes every two weeks and I’ll most likely have Saturdays but I never know until 2 weeks before.
( WAIT WAIT WAIT…How did she get off the days for the WEDDING…and the day after….If she doesn’t know until 2 weeks before?? WAIT!!!! How is she and her not-yet-divorced boyfriend planning on going away if she doesn’t know 2 weeks in advance about a Saturday? I DON’T GET IT.)
Me: Well…I can’t wait that long to plan…. Oh, well. No worries.
Her: Well, I don’t expect you to…I just don’t want to give you false expectations either.
Me: I want you to be there. You’re my maid of honor and I want to try and work out the best time for everyone…
Her: I want to be there…very much…Planning around my job is almost impossible. If the 8th works out for everyone else, that’s better for me.
Me: I’ll do what I can.
- – -
But after careful consideration and a conversation with my mom…I can’t possibly do it on the 8th. The semester ends on the 14th. I will have finals that week. I do NOT want to deal with a bridal shower right before FINALS. No thanks.
So I later texted her and emailed her along with the other bridesmaids that I was setting the date as August 15th. That’s it. That’s final and I explained why I was doing it that day.
She never texted me back.
I don’t know what to do. I’m just disappointed. We’ve been frenimies (friend & enemies!) since middle school. She’s a good friend to me. She has been for an awfully long time. She was there for me when I left Trent. SHE helped me move out. She did everything she could to help me. Shoot, she’s still storing some of my things that I haven’t gotten over here to Dan’s place. She’s a good friend to me overall. She is.
But I think I may only keep one maid of honor….my matron of honor. Because while she may be a good friend…I don’t think I can consider her a maid of honor. She’s certainly not made of honor — I just feel like there is something she isn’t being honest about and it hurts me feelings.
I know she and my matron of honor do not really get along….and I hope that’s not the reason she’s trying to find a way out of this whole thing….
I’m so confused and disappointed….
